I talk a lot of shit for someone who panics while ordering food at restaurants

oomshi:

when my fridge is empty so is my heart

have u ever accidentally opened the wrong cabinet in ur kitchen and it’s just like wtf how long have i lived here again

unicornsandrainbowmoustaches:

i could never be a politician because every time it was my turn to talk in a debate it would start off with “listen you fucking prick” like idk how these people don’t do this

internetexplorers:

if a boy calls you “Hot” he’s looking at your body me

if he calls you “Pretty” he’s looking at your face me

if he says “You’re beautiful” he’s looking at your soul me